i challenged myself to forget myself this week.
yes you read that correctly.
i recently watched The Kite Runner, and albiet a beautiful heartwrenching story, it doesnt really have anything to do with plain old little me.
so why did it effect me so much? i dont really know. wish it hadnt to be honest. there i was, minding my own business one lovely tuesday evening, drinking my tea, when i decided to watch it.
and then WHAM! like being slapped in the face with a frozen herring.i felt awful. not because of the sombre story line, oh no. but because of who i was. (again im not quite sure as to how these two are related, but i am assuming its the movies fault, so bare with me...)
i realised how selfish we have become. we nitpic and argue over the tiniest things in our lives as if they were matters of life and death. we laugh about other people's misfortunes and make crude jokes.we fight and we hate and we ignore.
but worst of all. we are indifferent.
but why?
how can i so easily turn a blind eye to the people who truly need someone. why arent i there for them? what makes me so arrogant that i assume my matters are of more importance? they arent.
the news headlines read about death and war and destruction, and yet instantly forgotten the moment the anchorman starts talking about sport.
we see numbers but we dont see the people.
we see corpses covered in sheets but we never learn their names.
we see guns but we dont feel those bullets.
and for what?
so somewhere someone can have more money? the cruel reality is that that money is ours. its us. yes, thats correct. YOU.
ME.
i guess the movie just shook me out of my dreamlike state, and i awoke to a very cruel reality.
sometimes my heart gets so heavy with the sorrows of the world, and i feel too tired to even cry. sometimes my chest aches as tho i could possibly stop breathing (although this could boil down to a bad habit and my asthma).. but i push it aside and carry on as though its nothing.
i know there must be something i can do. and i think its at least about time i actually tried.
ours is a world of nucleur giants and ethical infants. we know more about war than we know about peace, more about killing than we know about living -Omar. N. Bradley
life is more than fame and rock n roll and thrills,
all the riches of kings end up in wills,
we got information in the information age,
but do we know what life is,
outside of our convenient Lexus cages?- gone by Switchfoot